When Should We Call Out Bullshit?

There is a fine line between calling people out for their bullshit and staying quiet to keep the peace. I often find myself in situations where my values are being challenged and don’t know how to respond when these things happen. Sometimes I say nothing and think later about what I should have said. I come up with eloquent responses in my head, but it is no use if they remain inside. Other times I find myself in the heat of the moment responding, likely not in the most eloquent of ways, but saying something nonetheless.

When is an appropriate time to say something and when should I keep my mouth shut? Does it matter if doing something makes those around me feel uncomfortable, even if I know in my heart that I should? And even if I do say something, does it mean people will actually care, or will they become defensive and close themselves off from what I have to say?

Values, in and of themselves, are difficult things to grapple with. Every situation is different and a certain response may be appropriate in certain situations and not others.

What should we do when someone is being treated unfairly? How do we alleviate the tension without making it worse?

I am proud of myself for those times that I stand up for what I believe in, even if nobody else is standing beside me. I think it is our responsibility to call out bullshit when we see it, but I also wonder how we might do this most effectively.

Should we leave friendships and relationships with those who do not share our values? Is it really that simple? Everyone has such differing perspectives based on their life experiences, and one person’s values may be both completely legitimate, but also contrasting with my own at the same time. Are certain values objectively “right” and others “wrong?” Are we just trying to conceptualize things that just intrinsically don’t mean anything at all?

Even if there are certain values that are more ethical or moral than others, how can I be sure that mine fall into this category? How can we do what is right if the concept of what is just is completely subjective? Am I biased to believe that what I think is right even if it is not?

Once again, I am full of questions and empty of answers.