colors of emotion

colors of emotion
cloud my vision
framing the outer layers
of my understanding of reality

i often forget
that these are
t e m p o r a r y
and underneath the feeling
lies a world
quite different from the one of my perception

they blur the images
of my waking life
and i falsely believe
my view is entirely objective

anything less than pure clarity
is a delusion of the mind
i seek refuge
in the euphoria of pink and purple
bright yellow
calming blue

attempting to hold on
to a skewed version of existence

but the colors change
without any effort at all
and i can’t choose
what will come next

the deep purple transforms
into a darker black
red spots of fury
blue rings of sadness

and just like that
the delusion morphs
from a lightness and beauty
to melancholy and confusion

i attribute value
to the delusions that feel good
but underneath it all
they’re no different
from the inner turmoil
caused by darkness and despair

i become a slave to my desires
attempting to instill euphoria at will
but the more i attempt to hold on
the more the feeling eludes me
transforming into the darkness
and then back again

i’ve spent far too much time
chasing after colors
because the idea of rose colored glasses
is far more exciting
than the stability
offered by clarity